As a parent or carer, you know your child better than anyone. But sometimes, it can be hard to tell the difference between “typical teen behaviour” and signs that something deeper is going on.
Young people often won’t say directly when they’re having a tough time. Instead, it shows up in their mood, behaviour, or even their routines. The good news? You don’t have to have all the answers — just being present and open can make a big difference.
Here’s what to look out for, and how to support your child if they might be struggling.
Common Signs to Look Out For
Every young person is different, but here are some common changes that might be a sign they’re having a hard time:
Behaviour Changes
- Withdrawing from friends, family or usual activities
- Spending more time alone or in their room
- Acting more irritable, angry or easily upset
- Changes in sleeping or eating patterns
Mood Shifts
- Seeming flat, down or hopeless
- Overwhelmed by small things
- Feeling worthless or talking negatively about themselves
- Tearful or anxious for no clear reason
School or Routine Disruptions
- Skipping school or falling behind
- Losing interest in school, hobbies or sports
- Not caring about things that they used to enjoy
Risky or Out-of-Character Behaviours
- Sudden changes in appearance or friend groups
- Using substances or engaging in unsafe behaviours
- Talking about wanting to “give up” or disappear
It’s important not to panic if you notice one or two of these things — but if you see a pattern, or your gut tells you something’s not quite right, it might be time to gently check in.
What You Can Do
- Start the conversation — gently
Pick a quiet moment when you both feel calm. Try saying:
“I’ve noticed you’ve seemed a bit different lately — I just want to check in. How are you doing?”
You don’t need to force a big talk. Just showing you’ve noticed and that you care opens the door.
- Listen without judgment
Your child might not open up straight away — and that’s okay. Be patient, let them speak at their own pace, and avoid jumping in with advice too soon.
Say things like:
“Thanks for telling me.”
“That sounds really tough.”
“I’m here for you — no matter what.”
- Keep the door open
Even if they brush you off at first, let them know you’re always around to talk. It can take time to feel ready.
- Offer support, not pressure
If your child is open to it, suggest options like talking to:
- A school wellbeing officer
- A trusted teacher or relative
- A counsellor or youth worker
- A service like Kids Helpline or Headspace
When to Reach Out for Extra Help
If things aren’t improving or you’re seriously worried about your child’s wellbeing, it’s okay to reach out to professionals for extra support. You don’t have to do this alone.
Support options include:
- Your local GP or mental health nurse
- Upper Hunter Youth Services (10–18s and families)
- Kids Helpline – 1800 55 1800
- Lifeline – 13 11 14
Final Thoughts
Parenting teens isn’t easy — and there’s no perfect script for supporting a young person through a tough time. But showing up, staying open, and letting them know you care creates the safety they need to start talking.
Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is simply:
“You don’t have to go through this alone.”
